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Jesus Punched Jedi in the Face, Saith the Police


Woe unto a Star Wars cosplayer, for a man dressed like Jesus decked him with a punch to the face, saith police. It happened early Wednesday around 3 a.m. in Dundee, Scotland after a Halloween party at the Dundee University Student Association headquarters, according to The Independent. And the victim, clothed as a Jedi knight, did fall to the ground, breaking his ankle to shivers as the vessels of a potter, saith cops. He required succor from a hospital.

Blessed are those who leave the scene of the crime: for investigators cannot find them. Police seek Jesus. Verily, they ask witnesses to contact them about the Lord’s whereabouts. They describe him as mid-20s, about 5’10” fall, featuring a “medium build, with long brown hair, a beard, and wearing long robes as a fancy dress costume.”

Neither God nor the Jedi Council could be reached for comment.

[image Zwiebackesser and Shutterstock]

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